Sadness surrounding acceptance.

This is something I've been thinking a lot about, feeling the pain and sadness of, and coming into realization of the realities of my situation. It may come across as harsh, but I am hoping it comes across as direct and honest as I have attempted to articulate what is most likely too deep for my words:

ACCEPTING you
does not mean that I must
AGREE with you
and AFFIRM your choices.
It means I take you
as you are.

Somewhere along the way, our culture has twisted the word acceptance, seeking from it what it is not required to, and often cannot, give. I live in a culture where the majority of people hold, model, uplift and celebrate beliefs, practices and worldviews that I do not agree with. To the best of my ability (I am a work in progress who is learning daily), I walk in the truth of the bible, and as “narrow” as that may make me, it is not a book of truth that I designed; it has been laid out for me by the one true God. If I am “narrow” because of it, it is not actually I who offend you.

However, like I said, I live in a pluralistic society; a society that celebrates things that grieve my heart; a culture that denies that there is one truth and clings to the belief that they get to do “truth a la carte,” picking and choosing what they want to be real and discarding what they don’t; a culture that calls for acceptance.

To the best of my ability, I seek to take people as they are. I don’t cram my religious beliefs down their throats, insisting they take ahold of them. I don’t set out with motives of changing people’s minds when I speak with them. I attempt to listen and understand a person and their experiences.

But do I speak and live out what I believe? Yes, I do. Not perfectly (since I am human, and all), but often with more conviction than many, because I am fully convinced of the one true God of the bible to Whom there is only one way, Jesus Christ.

What frustrates and saddens me is that often times before a person will receive or believe my acceptance and love, they have placed a requirement on me that I first must agree with their choices and affirm their way of living. This is an unreasonable requirement, because in the light of my beliefs and convictions, I cannot do so without severely dishonoring my God and watering down the name of Jesus.

I often find myself wanting to yell, “WHY are you insisting that I judge you?” I am not called to judge my fellow human beings, I am also not called to affirm or agree with them; I am called to love them. And, I am not called to love them the way they may want me to, I am called to love them as Christ loves me.

So, let me tell you about Christ's love for me. 1 John says that “this is love; not that I love God, but that HE loves me and laid down His life for me.” My love is fickle; it would rather walk away from unlovable actions and personalities; it is based on feeling and the whim of my swaying heart; it has me, my happiness and my comfort at the center; its actions often come from a longing to fill empty space with an object to love. WHY would someone want THAT, when they could be loved God’s way? God’s love for me is entirely different: It is unchanging, committed love with pure motives and promise backing it up; it springs from fullness and a desire to share the joy of fullness of love with people; it is sacrificial, willing to undergo death itself for the good of its enemies; it transforms by its mere presence because it desires more for us than our love for ourselves allows; it pursues the unlovable, the outcast, the sinner with passionate persistence and kindness beyond what we could imagine or even know to desire; it is offered at a great price, one that can never be repaid or earned; it is complete and does not demand or take from the one it lands upon; it is merciful, gracious, patient, firm and shepherding; the one who dares receive and believe it cannot help but respond with everything they are, have and desire.

I believe what the bible tells me is true: I am a sinner who has separated myself from the One true God, who is perfect and just. I cannot restore that relationship myself, but God, in His infinite love and mercy, sent His son Jesus to bare the wrath and punishment my sinful actions require for pure justice to be upheld and deep relationship to be restored to the One I have offended. There is only way to God; Jesus Christ, whom everyone has the opportunity to cling to through grace by faith. God Himself, sent Himself (Jesus) to save us from and for Himself. That is what I walk in.

And while these beliefs may not allow for me to affirm your choices or agree with your worldview, they call me to love you as and where you are. Whether you are willing to receive what I can offer or reject me because I cannot give what you demand is entirely up to you.

moved to worship by His love

sold
©8-2-10 hannah mclean

sold
i am sold out
for You
eyes closed
heart soaring
worship flows for You alone
all laid out before You
naught withheld

joy sustaining

longing for You
to receive Your worth
unable to provide from my hands
but all i am
all i have
is laid out before You
offered in love and thanksgiving
at the foot of Your throne

joy overflowing

sold
i am sold out
for You
Your presence my desire
Your mercy my hope
Your glory my goal
Your worth my worship
tears pour
a mere sprinkle
in the presence of Your lavish grace

though my lips are silent
as i kneel before You
joy and worship sweep
through and around me
like a uplifting wind

one word rolls through my mind:
sold

i am sold out
for You,
my Savior
my Lord
my King

joy everlasting