Saturday, December 10, 2011

"Longing for Egypt"

Today as I prayed over my church, there was a phrase that burdened my heart, “We’re longing for Egypt.” And my prayers were filled with pleas that the Lord would show us mercy and turn our eyes to Him that we would not look back, long back or go back to where we have been, but that we would continue to move forward toward where He desires us to be. God has been doing many things within our Body. Obviously I don’t know them all, but can tell you of one thing that applies to this particular prayer and the thoughts following. God is doing a deep work right now: He’s healing deep wounds; He’s freeing us from deep sins; He’s opening up the deep, locked places of our souls. And it is ugly, and it is painful, and it is scary and at times it is dreadfully slow going...and the results of His finished work will be GLORIOUS! 

Do you understand now why we have the “longing for Egypt” that we see in the Israelites as they journeyed to the promised land? But why would we want our modern day Egypts? Are they really worth returning to?
 
In Exodus, we see several descriptions of the environment and situations of the children of Israel while in Egypt.: 

Exodus 1:8-13 Now there arose a new king over Egypt, who did not know Joseph. And he said to his people, "Behold, the people of Israel are too many and too mighty for us. Come, let us deal shrewdly with them, lest they multiply, and, if war breaks out, they join our enemies and fight against us and escape from the land." Therefore they set taskmasters over them to afflict them with heavy burdens. They built for Pharaoh...And the Egyptians...ruthlessly made the people of Israel work as slaves and made their lives bitter with hard service, in mortar and brick, and in all kinds of work in the field. In all their work they ruthlessly made them work as slaves.
 
Things were not good in Egypt. This description in Exodus is where their slavery BEGAN, it was followed by increasingly violent and cruel endeavors as Pharaoh failed in his attempts to subdue and crush God’s people. For example, he started killing the infants as they were being born, and after God began to command that he release the Israelites, Pharaoh began to place unreasonable labor demands on them (such as making bricks without providing the materials). Things were not good in Egypt; the people were enslaved, oppressed, cruelly treated and in despair.
 
And yet, when God gave them freedom, bringing them out of Egypt and into the desert on their way to the land and abundance He had promised them, there were many times along the way, in the center of various trials and hardships of the journey, where they lamented that they had left Egypt and longed to go back. So quickly they forgot.
 
Today as I considered this longing for Egypt, something else came to my mind:

Hebrews 11:24-26 By faith Moses, when he was grown up, refused to be called the son of Pharaoh’s daughter, choosing rather to be mistreated with the people of God than to enjoy the fleeting pleasures of sin. He considered the reproach of Christ greater wealth than the treasures of Egypt, for he was looking to the reward.
 
I thought about Moses. As an infant who had escaped being murdered at his birth, Moses was taken in by Pharaoh’s daughter and raised as her own. He grew up in the palaces of Egypt, surrounded by all the good the Egypt could muster. He lived the privileged life of an honored Egyptian. Egypt for Moses was a place of freedom and abundance, treasure and pleasure. And he chose to walk away from it all.
 
If there was anyone with reason to long for Egypt, surely it was Moses. Moses knew the best that Egypt had to offer. There is just something profound about the fact that God used Moses to lead His people out.
 
Whether they be pleasures or pains, all in this world is fleeting, it is only Christ that is eternal. May we not long for our Egypts, but may we long for Christ.
 
Luke 9:62 Jesus said to him, "No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for the kingdom of God." 
Lord, be merciful to us.

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

The Voice

The Lord gave me Psalm 29 the last month leading up to the AIDS Awareness Event week, and I found it to be the source that fueled many of my prayers throughout. I love this Psalm. Seriously. Talk about a beautifully articulated declaration of the Lord’s power, authority, majesty, glory and worth. As I read it, my heart crescendos with the Psalmists to such an extent that by the time I near the end, my heart burst as it joins the cry of “Glory” that fills His temple is response to observing Him. This Psalm is filled with such rich truths, and I wanted to try my best to share with you what I see spoken to me of God within these short verses.

Ascribe to the Lord, O heavenly beings,
ascribe to the Lord glory and strength.
Ascribe to the Lord the glory due His name;
worship the Lord in the splendor of holiness.


I love that this Psalm starts with an exhortation to acknowledge the Lord and to accredit Him with the realities of His character; to come before the Lord with a pure heart and from this state of wholeness, offer Him worship while clothed in “the splendor [beauty in NKJV] of holiness.” This is a good place to start a prayer, a reminder of WHO we in fact are praying to.

The voice of the Lord is over the waters;
the God of glory thunders,
the Lord, over many waters.
The voice of the Lord is powerful;
the voice of the Lord is full of majesty.


The first thing I see here is that we are dealing with the voice of the Lord, not His hand, not His presence, not His silent outworking, but His voice. It is a voice that is FULL, it is authoritative, it is the same voice that SPOKE creation into being, and it is the voice of the ONE who is over all.

The voice of the Lord breaks the cedars;
the Lord breaks the cedars of Lebanon.


Cedars of Lebanon were timbers of immense, solid, study strength; they were the best materials that men could harvest. These cedars were used to build Solomon’s Temple. They symbolize the strong things in this world.

This voice is able to break the strong things in this world. Whether it be walls or sanctuaries...or hearts or wills. There is nothing that is of strength or stability or hardness that can withstand the sound of this voice. This voice can burst apart bonds, shatter the doors of bronze, break in two the bars of iron (Psalm 107) and cause immense mountains to physically shake (Exodus 19). Whoa.

He makes Lebanon to skip like a calf,
and Sirion like a young wild ox.


The voice of God spurs things into motion. He cause the things He wishes to move, to move. Selah. Can you feel why this Psalm has comforted my soul? Praise the Lord.

The voice of the Lord flashes forth flames of fire.

These flames consume...burning until only what is eternal remains. And these flames produce the sparks that light our lamps. Selah.

The voice of the Lord shakes the wilderness;
the Lord shakes the wilderness of Kadesh.


When I think of the wilderness, I think of a place that is dry and arid, where the sun has baked things until what was once movable is much too hard, a place that is uninhabited by both people and plants, a place of unbearable heat and silence.

The voice of God shakes the wilderness. I feel this is the promise to wake up what has too long been asleep, still and silent; to shake what is hard and barren and dry.

The voice of the Lord makes the deer give birth

The voice of the Lord brings forth life.
The voice of the Lord brings forth life.
The voice of the Lord brings forth life.

and strips the forest bare,

The sound of this voice humbles and reveals. Here is truth: If we do not listen to the quiet voice as it speaks to us now, we will be brought to our knees eventually when it resounds around us at the return of our King.

and in His temple all cry, “Glory!”

What can be said in response to hearing this Voice speak with such power? What can be said in response to this incredible display of authority and promise? What can be said by those who observe our mighty God is action?
“Glory!” from our knees.
“GLORY!” with our hands upraised.
“Glory,” as we lie prostrate before His throne.
He is glorious, and glorious to behold.

The Lord sits enthroned over the flood;
the Lord sits enthroned as king forever.


A flood is a thing of devastation; it comes and destroys what is in its path, it shows no mercy or partiality in who it touches, it takes and breaks, it leaves behind a path of confusion, chaos, filth and decay, it is a terrible thing to look on its aftermath.

The AIDS Crisis is a flood. And God is still King. He still reigns even over this flood. And from the lips of an HIV+ orphan, “He can use even this for His glory.”

May the Lord give strength to His people!
May the Lord bless His people with peace!


Amen.

"Come as close as you/You want"

I encountered a Misty Edwards’ song the other day with the title “Come as Close as You Want.” I didn’t listen to it until after I had mused on its title for awhile.

My first thought when I heard this invitation, “Come as close as you want,” was to consider the voice of God inviting us into His presence. What an incredible, breath-taking statement of desire; for the God of ALL to want us near Himself. Whoa. And with the beauty of this articulated longing came the lament that though the Lord perseveres in His invitation to us, His voice is oftentimes ignored.

Into my mind came verses like these:
Isaiah 65:1-3a “I was ready to be sought by those who did not ask for Me; I was ready to be found by those who did not seek Me. I said, “Here am I, here am I,” to a nation that was not called by My name. I spread out my hands all the day to a rebellious people, who walk in a way that is not good, following their own devices; a people who provoke Me to My face continually...”

John 1:11“He came to His own, but His own people did not receive Him.”


The invitation of the Lord: “Come as close as you want,” He says...”In fact, I even want you to abide IN Me, to be ONE with Me, to KNOW ME as you have been known (John 15).” Accepted or rejected, both sides bring about emotive contemplations.

Then I listened to the song and read the lyrics...this is not the direction Misty Edwards went. She spoke as a person saying to the Lord, “Come as close as You want! (In fact, I even want You to abide IN me, to be ONE with me, I want to KNOW You.)”

Do I say that to the Lord? Do I extend this invitation to my Creator, Savior, King? When I hear the invitation into the presence of God, do I say, “Nah, this is close enough. I am comfortable,” or does my heart reciprocate with a longing, responsive cry, “Come as close as YOU want.”

I was grateful to have considered the title before I heard the song, because I believe this is an invitation to consider from both angles and would encourage you to meditate on these statements:

God to you: Come as close as you want.
You to God: Come as close as You want.

Saturday, December 3, 2011

the beauty of humility

humble yourself before the Lord
and He will exalt you
©11-27-11 hannah mclean
1 peter 5:6-7


may i rejoice in my humility
for to be humbled in my eyes
is to be exalted in Yours
to be emptied of me
leads to fullness in You

such beauty
to be known
when life is not of me
but of You

may the distance between You and i
only serve to magnify
the mercy of the One who unites

why should i stand afar
when You extend Yourself to draw me?

do not let me hide away
from the sight of You
for the Light humbles Itself
to exalt the humble

such beauty
to be known
when life is not of me
but of You

Monday, November 14, 2011

Picture: Bound in the presence of freeing Light

This is the picture that the Lord gave me during a time of intercession: A person stood before me, bound from neck to foot in chains; at their feet were heaps of stones, making the ground difficult to navigate; also within arms reach were walls of brick and mortar, unfinished and serving as shoddy, incomplete protective barriers. Around this person shone beautiful, vivid Light; surrounding them, warming them, pouring upon them with all the power to burst apart these bonds. And as I took in this picture, I heard these lamenting words, “Why? Oh why do you stand bound in the presence of freeing Light?!”

----

Your chains clink against each other
grinding in your restricted movements
refusing to go unnoticed.

Around your feet in crumbling heaps
of teetering uncertainty
stones remain
left behind as memorials of ruins.

Carefully laid bricks serve as your harrowing backdrop
shoddy walls with rows of sloppy mortar
patched and decaying with age
revealing fria’bility.

You are a sight to behold
bound from neck to foot
with only your defeated head
limply moving from side to side.

Open your eyes.

Open your eyes!

OPEN YOUR EYES!

You stand in the center
of freeing Light!
Light that shatters chains that bind
crumbles stones of stumbling
shields with immovable perfection where bricks will always fail.

All is provided
surrounding
waiting
shining...

Why?
Oh why do you stay bound
in the presence of freeing Light?

----

John 8:12,31-32,36 When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life...If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free...So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.”

Thursday, November 3, 2011

"The greatest time to be alive."

A visiting pastor from Berlin spoke at my church this past month, he said something in his sermon that still rolls around in my mind. The contrast of his words to my typical thoughts is so stark that I appreciate the presence of his words for them to bounce off of.

He said, “This is the greatest time to be alive.” When he looks at the world we are in, he sees the greatness of opportunity and the beauty of new life just longing to spring forth, he sees fields ripe for the harvest and hunger and thirst about to be quenched...and it makes him say, “This is the greatest time to be alive.”

I don’t think I have ever said that, nor can I remember ever actually thinking that. So often I look around me and I lament in tears; I see the momentum of the decay of sin, the wounds of generations that have rejected the Lord, a spiral of darkness that would cause me to despair if I did not have the Savior to cling to. So often I look at the world around me and feel as Solomon speaks in the book of Ecclesiastes 4:1–3 “Again I saw all the oppressions that are done under the sun. And behold, the tears of the oppressed, and they had no one to comfort them! On the side of their oppressors there was power, and there was no one to comfort them. And I thought the dead who are already dead more fortunate than the living who are still alive. But better than both is he who has not yet been and has not seen the evil deeds that are done under the sun.”

I see oppressed without a comforter.
I see oppressors without a comforter.
I see wickedness making the lives of the living a place of pain.
And I plead for mercy and for Jesus to come back.

But, while I don’t think this view and plea are bad, I cannot rest in this lament. That is one of the reasons I so appreciate these words, “This is the greatest time to be alive.” The Lord convicted me a while back during a service of this truth, “It is not enough to desire to be with Jesus. You must desire also that EVERYONE would be with Him.”

I know the Comforter, the Hope, the Truth, the Life. When I look at the world around me, I must rejoice in the reality that what often makes me want to despair is really just opportunity for another to know this Comforter, this Hope, this Truth and this Life. I can reach out my hands on His behalf, open my mouth to speak His words and find in those I weep over hope-filled companions to spend eternity with. I get to bring Jesus. With this beauty, how can my heart not resonate with this response, “This is the greatest time to be alive!”

Thursday, October 20, 2011

"The doctrines of grace humble a man without degrading him and exalt a man without inflating him." ~ Charles Hodge

I tend to be someone who doesn’t dodge their emotions, but deals with them head on--if I am sad, I sit down and cry it out until the tears are dry; if I am angry, I process what has made me this way to seek the root and remove it, etc.--and then I move on.

But I do not wallow in these emotions alone. I always bring the Word.

I tend to really resonate with Psalms. One of the things I love about them is that they capture the real emotions of a human and show what happens when in those painful places you speak Truth to yourself. In a single Psalm, you find psalmists who, pushed to the point of despair because of their circumstances, after their encounter with the Lord (pouring themselves out before Him and glorying in the Truth of Him) find themselves lifted to their feet with hands upraised in joyful praise. Their circumstances didn’t change, but they did. That is such a wonderful example of the relevance and importance of knowing the Bible, knowing the testimonies and promises inside, and the character of the God who made them.

So, in my sadness yesterday, sitting in the presence of the Lord and bringing to Him my sorrows, I found myself in David’s Psalm 21:1–7:

“O Lord, in Your strength the king rejoices, and in Your salvation how greatly he exults! You have given him his heart’s desire and have not withheld the request of his lips. Selah. For You meet him with rich blessings; You set a crown of fine gold upon his head. He asked life of You; You gave it to him, length of days forever and ever. His glory is great through Your salvation; splendor and majesty You bestow on him. For You make him most blessed forever; You make him glad with the joy of Your presence. For the king trusts in the Lord, and through the steadfast love of the Most High he shall not be moved.”

Do you ever read scripture and feel yourself physically humbled, slowly sinking into your chair with each word as strength leaves your body? This passage does that to me. 


James 4:10 says, “Humble yourselves before the Lord, and He will exalt you.” I am often struck by the realization that in seeing the ways in which He has exalted me, I am increasingly humbled. I mean, look at this verse, it is the declaration of the lavish love, blessing and favor given us by our God! In reminds of these Truths: In Christ, I have been given God’s strength in my helpless weakness (2 Cor 12:9) and salvation in the face of deserved destruction (1 Peter 2:24); in Christ, I am richly blessed with every Spiritual and eternal good thing (Ephesians 1–3); in Christ, I am royalty, to reign with my King (2 Cor 2:11–13); in Christ, God has given me more than I could ever think to ask for (Eph 3:20-21); in Christ, I will stand before the Father blameless and holy (Eph 5:25–27); in Christ, I have a hope while on earth and an eternal inheritance (1 Peter 1:3–5); in Christ, I have fullness of joy (Psalm 16:11), an open invitation into the presence of the Lord (Heb 4:14–16), and the word of a faithful God on which to plant my unsteady feet (Deut 7:9).

So as I came to the Lord, curled up in His arms with tears falling on “the broad expanse of who He is," I read the words declaring His love for me, and my tears turned into those of joyful humility as I bowed to Him in praise. 


I praise You, Lord, that to glory in You is to bask in the beauty of the eternal, which never ceases to overshadow the gloom of all that is temporary. You are more than enough and I praise You.

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

when words fail, You prevail

You are real
©10-19-11 hannah mclean

You are real
i bank my life
now and eternally
on the realities of You
You hold me up
You hold me up

what would I be
if You didn’t see
my tears?
how could i stand
were it not for Your hand?
where would my head lie?
in the dust

o my Lord,
i know
You are real
You feel what I feel
Your touch heals so much
Your face lends such grace
Your arms fend for me

when words fail
You prevail
You lift me up
You lift me
closer to You
lest i sigh alone

engulfed in Your presence
i am free to be
frail
fragile
fumbling
in safety

You are real
faithful Comfort for the one who is
Your own

Thursday, October 13, 2011

For the sake of 10.

I am studying the book of Daniel, and if you have ever discussed scripture with me, you know that my mind is constantly jumping to other places in the Good Book that come to mind and seem to connect to what I am reading. This is my detour today.

Daniel 7:9–10 holds a meditation concerning the righteous Judge that I will write about soon, but only after this short jaunt to Abraham’s conversation with God in Genesis.

Genesis 18:20–33 Then the LORD said, "Because the outcry against Sodom and Gomorrah is great and their sin is very grave, I will go down to see whether they have done altogether according to the outcry that has come to me. And if not, I will know." So the men turned from there and went toward Sodom, but Abraham still stood before the LORD. Then Abraham drew near and said, "Will you indeed sweep away the righteous with the wicked? Suppose there are fifty righteous within the city. Will you then sweep away the place and not spare it for the fifty righteous who are in it? Far be it from you to do such a thing, to put the righteous to death with the wicked, so that the righteous fare as the wicked! Far be that from you! Shall not the Judge of all the earth do what is just?" And the LORD said, "If I find at Sodom fifty righteous in the city, I will spare the whole place for their sake." Abraham answered and said, "Behold, I have undertaken to speak to the Lord, I who am but dust and ashes. Suppose five of the fifty righteous are lacking. Will you destroy the whole city for lack of five?" And he said, "I will not destroy it if I find forty-five there." Again he spoke to him and said, "Suppose forty are found there." He answered, "For the sake of forty I will not do it." Then he said, "Oh let not the Lord be angry, and I will speak. Suppose thirty are found there." He answered, "I will not do it, if I find thirty there." He said, "Behold, I have undertaken to speak to the Lord. Suppose twenty are found there." He answered, "For the sake of twenty I will not destroy it." Then he said, "Oh let not the Lord be angry, and I will speak again but this once. Suppose ten are found there." He answered, "For the sake of ten I will not destroy it." And the LORD went his way, when he had finished speaking to Abraham, and Abraham returned to his place.

Genesis 19:27–28 And Abraham went early in the morning to the place where he had stood before the Lord. And he looked down toward Sodom and Gomorrah and toward all the land of the valley, and he looked and, behold, the smoke of the land went up like the smoke of a furnace.


This passage of scripture makes me weep. Not just for one reason, but for many.

Look at Abraham’s interaction with God, he draws near to Him and acknowledges Him as the righteous Judge of the whole earth; he appeals to His perfect justice and His love for His people. He came to the Lord and says, “What if 50 of Your people live in this place You are going to destroy? Do they deserve a punishment not due them?” And God, with gentleness and sadness knowing there are only four, tells Abraham that for their sake He would spare the entire valley filled with wickedness. And Abraham keeps coming back, tiptoeing, it may seem, but approaching none-the-less, until he reaches a number he seems to believe is almost absurd; to reach so low for such a great mercy:

“For the sake of 10?”

And the Lord, in compassion for the heart of Abraham that appeals to and reveals His own so vividly, gives a response that moves me with awe and wonder and pain:

“For the sake of 10, I will not destroy it.”

What a patient and compassionate God. This interaction surrounding Sodom and Gomorrah displays the heart of God from two sides, I truly believe that Abraham is articulating God’s desire and sorrow over a wicked people to be lost for eternity (Ezekiel 33:11 “Say to them, As I live, declares the Lord GOD, I have no pleasure in the death of the wicked, but that the wicked turn from his way and live; turn back, turn back from your evil ways, for why will you die, O house of Israel?"). And as they speak, we also have the opportunity to observe God patient, long-suffering, loving heart as He gives a merciful answer to Abraham’s every request.

There were not even 10 people who loved the Lord in the valley. Not even 10.

Friday, October 7, 2011

By the faith of another

Matthew 15:21–28: And Jesus went away from there and withdrew to the district of Tyre and Sidon. And behold, a Canaanite woman from that region came out and was crying, “Have mercy on me, O Lord, Son of David; my daughter is severely oppressed by a demon.” But He did not answer her a word. And his disciples came and begged Him, saying, “Send her away, for she is crying out after us.” He answered, “I was sent only to the lost sheep of the house of Israel.” But he came and knelt before Him, saying, “Lord, help me.” And He answered, “It is not right to take the children’s bread and throw it to the dogs.” She said, “Yes, Lord, yet even the dogs eat the crumbs that fall from their masters’ table.” Then Jesus answered her, “O woman, great is your faith! Be it done for you as you desire.” And her daughter was healed instantly.

The Lord has used this passage in powerful ways in my life; I was saved under a sermon from this place in Matthew. It is dear to my heart.

One thing I love about the bible is that it never gets old. You can read it a million times, and still find new treasures of great worth inside every verse. I like to refer to meditation and study of the texts as “wringing out the Word”...drawing all that can be found from every word.

So I was delighted that when my husband and I were reading this chapter together this week, I was struck anew by what I saw within these precious verses. Here is my meditation:

Healed by the faith of another

I have often considered this Canaanite woman’s interaction with Jesus. I resonate with her persistent approach of Him despite what appeared to be continual rejection. I resonate with her acknowledgment that while she is deserving of nothing, there are crumbs of grace to be had and she knew she could be satisfied by even a drop of what the Lord had to offer. I resonate with her in her
unwavering pursuit of mercy from the giver of mercy, and the joy of receiving the desire of her heart.

But this time, what struck me about this Canaanite woman is the content of her plea to the Lord. She came on behalf of her demon oppressed daughter. She came crying, plowing through silence, past those who sought to send her away, claiming her pitiful status and the rights that came with it...all to kneel before the Savior on behalf of another. Nothing could hold her back from the One who promised, “Whoever comes to Me I will never cast out.” (John 6:37)

And though it wasn’t the daughter who persisted through what appeared to be the silence of being ignored, or what sounded like the disapproving requests of those who surrounded the One she needed; though the daughter did not kneel, look into the Lord’s eyes and plead, “Help me!”; though the daughter never approached Jesus at all...these words were written of her, “And her daughter was healed instantly.”

Sometimes when Jesus healed, freed and redeemed people throughout His life and ministry, He did it because of their faith. But sometimes when Jesus healed, freed and redeemed people, He did it because of the faith of another.

“O woman, great is your faith! Be it done for you as you desire.”

O Lord, strengthen my faith! Strengthen my hands, my knees, my lips and my heart that I may pursue the good of those who cannot, will not or do not know how to come to You. May I be like this Canaanite woman who will let nothing hold her back from the crumbs of Your grace, whether they be gathered for myself or for another. And I praise You for those who have come to You with the faith through which You have healed, freed and redeemed me. It says in Hebrews 12:15, “See to it that no one fails to obtain the grace of God...” Lord, may my prayers, pleas and persistence in Your presence bring about the eternal good of many that they may obtain Your grace through my unwavering faith. It is only faith in You that can keep us firm to the end, Lord. I ask that You strengthen my faith for Your glory, the joy of Your people and the furthering of Your kingdom. In the worthy name of Jesus I pray. Amen.

Thursday, October 6, 2011

my worshipful morning

glorying in You
©10-6-11 hannah mclean

caught up
in the worship of You
my bible open
but untouched before me
my eyes closed
my hands open
my heart entwined
with the music that redounds
around and through me

my soul longs for You
reaching heavenward
with deep benevolence
at the burning blaze of Your worth
i am undone

Father, hold me
Hope, console me
Spirit, overflow me

poured out
but filled by the
brightness of You
i yearn for nothing
but Your eternal presence
beautiful and supreme

glorying in You alone
i am caught up
in worship



how are You so good to me?
how is it that You hold nothing back in Your love of me?
how are my lips so silent in
the face of One so worthy of praise?

RING OUT
RING OUT
RING OUT

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

The result of a look into the book of Ecclesiasties

Almighty in sufficiency
©10-2-11 hannah mclean

You ARE
all i need
almighty
in sufficiency
You ARE
You ARE all i need

i have wandered
in my seeking
but in all of the places
i have not found
what can only
be known in You

You ARE
all i need
sovereign
for eternity
You ARE
You ARE all i need

in my wanting
in my waning
in my doubt and
in my pain
in my coping
in my longing
in my pride and
in my shame

You ARE
all i need
You ARE
all i need
Lord, You ARE
all i need

You ARE glorious
You ARE holy
You ARE strength and
You ARE worthy
You ARE hope and
You ARE majesty
You ARE
all i need

You ARE
You ARE all i need

Thursday, September 29, 2011

There is another Way.

My heart is heavy, but my prayers are thick because there is Hope. As long as there is life, there is hope.

What I see
©9-29-11 Hannah McLean

The depth of her soul

cries out for You
and her mind says
“NO.
I must walk by sight,
it is the only way
to go.”

And she silences the
sound
with the noises all
around
ready and eager to
drown
and overpower
the reality that resists
her way of being.
And she bleeds
and weeps
and sits amid the battered
heap of life’s wounds
a broken vessel
unable to hold
what fills her.

The depth of her soul
cries out for You
and her minds says
“NO.
I must walk by sight
it is the only way
to go.”

And she drowns the
guttural moans
of her internal being
with chemicals
and minerals
and anything that
keeps her eyes away
from the reality
of her decay.
And she bleeds
and weeps
and lies amid the dismay of
life without You
denying the need
and continuing to feed
on lies
till pangs
of pain and hunger
consume
and all that remains is
emptiness.

But the depth of her soul
will never cease
to cry
because You want her.

Thursday, September 15, 2011

The voice of the Lord shakes the wilderness...” Psalm 29:8a

a prayer for the sound of His voice
©9-14-11 hannah mclean
psalm 29

o Lord
lift up Your voice and
shake the wilderness
till the desert
arid
barren
dry lands
in the heart of man
tremble
and crack
aware of the Living Water
that they lack.
speak with Power
speak with Majesty
till the sands of
time
and lies
and pain
and pride
shake free
and fall to the ground
at the feet
of Your Glory.
o Lord
send forth Your Word
open ears to hear
and eyes to see
and hearts to know
to fear
to bow
to kiss Your hand.
for You are
the Only True
and Living God
of every man.

Friday, September 9, 2011

Mediations from Daniel: Great Mercy

Great Mercy [Daniel 9:18]

Another meditation from Chapter 9 of the book of Daniel. At the end of his heart-moving prayer to the Lord, upon hearing that the Israelites would remain in captivity in Babylon for 70 years, you will find a verse you should put in your memory and use often as you position yourself in prayer.

Daniel 9:18 “O my God, incline Your ear and hear. Open Your eyes and see our desolations, and the city that is called by Your name. For we do not present our pleas before You because of our righteousness, but because of Your great mercy.”

I am so struck by this verse. So struck. The first 15 verse of this chapter are filled with confession and a spirit of repentance. Daniel lays out the sins committed against the Lord by His people, “we have sinned....we have acted wickedly...we have not listened...to us belongs shame...we turned aside....refused to obey...” He weeps in sackcloth and ashes, and devotes himself to fasting and prayer. He acknowledges the righteousness of God, the unrighteousness of His people, and the justice in their suffering.

And yet, as he is on his face before the Lord, aware that Israel deserves the situation they are in, he pleads for mercy. He says to the Lord, “We are Your people, called by Your glorious name...and we are a disgrace in the eyes of those who look on and rule over us. In the midst of our just desolation, I am pleading with You because You are merciful and we are desperately in need.” He didn’t shy away from the Lord, even in the Lord’s just anger. He didn’t barter with the Lord and say, “We did this and this in the past, or what if we do this and this now or later.” He didn’t credit one ounce of worth to himself or the rest of the Israelites, even though Daniel himself was walking uprightly before the Lord in Babylon. Instead, he fell on his face and said, “The depth of Your mercy is greater than the depth of our sin. We need Your mercy for our sin is great!”

Heavenly Father, may I walk humbly before You. Honest with myself and with You about who and what I am, while clinging to the reality of who and what You are: The One I cling to as Savior and bow to as Lord.

Meditations from Daniel: The Desolate Sanctuary

I’m studying the book of Daniel, and to start, I would just like to preface this meditation with one word: Whoa.

The book of Daniel is incredibly rich. On my first time through, I simply wrote down the verses and things that struck my heart, and as I continue my exploration of this piece of the Word, I have decided to write out some my meditations that seem too meaty to keep to myself.

The Desolate Sanctuary [Daniel 9:17]

In chapter 9, you will find what I would consider to be one of the most heart moving prayers recorded in the Bible. The position of Daniel’s heart is so correct that as he speaks to the Lord, it brings about a crescendo of emotions that draw you into his prayer and into worship. The verse I am considering today hit me like a ton of bricks as the weight of its reality fell on me.

Daniel 9:17 “Now therefore, O our God, listen to the prayer of Your servant and to his pleas for mercy, and for Your own sake, O Lord, make Your face to shine upon Your sanctuary, for it is desolate.”

The word desolate is one of the most heart wrenching words I can think of. It encompasses the following descriptions: barren (fruitless, unable to produce), devastated (laid to waste), abandoned (deserted), lonely (without companionship), destitute (lacking what is required to sustain) and sorrowful (gloom).

A sanctuary is a holy place, anointed for worship. It is a place for God and man to draw near to each other. A place that should ring with prayer and praise. A place where people should gather to be filled and to bring to the Lord all they have to offer Him. A place where hearts should resonate with the presence and beauty of the Lord. The scene surrounding and filling God’s sanctuary should look something like this:

Psalm 68:24–27 “Your procession is seen, O God, the procession of my God, my King, into the sanctuary--the singers in front, the musicians last, between them virgins playing tambourines: ‘Bless God in the great congregation, the Lord, o you who are of Israel’s fountain!’ There is Benjamin, the least of them, in the lead, the princes of Judah in their throng, the princes of Zebulun, the princes of Naphtali.”

Music and praise and crowds of people filing in to worship the Lord; what a lovely, deserving, heart-moving visual.

Daniel knows what should be; he knows that they are stuck in a foreign land and that God’s people are being pulled in various directions of idolatry. He has just been told by God that the length of Israel’s captivity in Babylon would be 70 years, and his heart is torn by the knowledge of a discouraged and wayward people who, to quote Psalm 137:1-4, lamented the loss of their joy and hope, “By the waters of Babylon, there we sat down and wept, when we remembered Zion. On the willows there we hung up our lyres. For there our captors required of us songs, and our tormentors, mirth, saying, ‘Sing us one of the songs of Zion!’ How shall we sing the Lord’s song in a foreign land?” These are things Daniel knew, and the grief that was manifested in his prayer was a multi-positional grief. Not only was the pain in his words pleading for mercy for God’s people, but a pain for the silence that rang out where worship was deserved and for the eyes that would grow to believe that the God who is truly great was not, because the sanctuary on which He had placed His holy name was in a state of devastation.

And so Daniel cries out to the Lord, “Shine Your face up on Your sanctuary.” Throughout the bible, this phrase is used repeatedly resulting in favor, peace, blessing, salvation and a bestowing of grace. For the Lord to receive the worship He alone is worthy of, Daniel knew that He must have mercy and act, and that the worth of His people was far too small a rock to stand on to appeal for restoration. Instead, his appeal was for the worth and fame of the majestic name of the one true and living God. In essence, he cried out to the Lord that even the disobedience and wickedness of God’s people would not be able to take from Him the worship, praise and glory due His name in this world; in his prayer he basically says, “We deserve this desolation, but Your sanctuary does not.”

Lord, make my heart zealous for You. May I not choose sin or allow circumstances to rob You of the worship You deserve. May my life reflect the reality of Your worth.

Sunday, September 4, 2011

Picture: The iron lantern

During worship today in the sanctuary, I was praying to the Lord that I would be wholly given over to Him, that He would open my ears to hear His voice and that I would be forever changed because of it.

As I prayed, I felt my heart leap inside of me and my hand instantly raise to cover it, as if it were going to come out of my chest. Then, without pain, I had the feeling of my heart being gently moved from my chest to my hand. I felt my hand holding my heart and I consciously lifted it up to Him in offering. With my hand upraised, He took the heart from my hand and lowered a lantern over it. The lantern was made of iron with windows on each of its four sides, each of the sides were flipped up like the petals of a flower, leaving it open on the bottom. After it encased my heart, the sides flipped down, closing over it, sort of in the shape of an acorn.

And then, to my surprise, He gave it back to me and it returned to its place inside me.

I did not know what it meant. I did not know why He gave it back.

As I sat confused, in my mind came Revelation 2:25.
I looked it up and it said, “Only hold on to what you have until I come.”
I think there is more to this picture, I look forward to its full explanation.

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

a moment with the Lord

abandoned to You
©8-9-11 hannah mclean

i lay me down
hands wide open
in a desperate gesture
of abandon and need

all for You

certain of the faithfulness
of the arms into which i fall
i give all

oh to love
and want
and desire
and need
with pure abandon

known purpose--
a life of devotion
to the One above

i lay me down
at Your feet
at Your feet

at Your feet

You extend Your hand
and lift me
as a shepherd to a lamb

i am
before the I AM

Sunday, July 31, 2011

picture: the Spirit dances

Today in the sanctuary, the Lord let me watch the Spirit dance over us as we worshiped Him. I watched a wind blow about in beautiful swirls, slowly taking on the form of a dancer. He danced with such an incredible fluidity and grace that I was left breathless. He didn’t need a floor to spring from, or another’s strength to lift Him, He simple danced effortlessly over His people with perfect precision and sync with the song, the power of His movements crescendoing and decrescendoing perfectly. I wish I could put into words the beauty of this dance, but there are none that could do it justice. I know only that it was a privilege to share in.

You dance over us
©7-31-11 hannah mclean

music flows to Your praise
in the beauty of worship
You open my eyes to behold You

You surround us in a twisting wind
fluidly You sweep around and through Your people
light and glorious and sweet
and as You move above our heads
You take on the form of a dancer
in and out and with the wind
You dance to the melodious music
brought to You

You dance over us
with a fluidity and grace
such as i have never imagined
weightless in purity
You need no ground beneath You
Your springs and leaps
empowered by a strength from within
as if hands unseen
lift, twirl and throw You about the air
effortlessly majestic

moved by You movement
with stunned tears
i simply take You in

Sunday, July 24, 2011

Picture: Living water from the hands of God

This morning I walked into the sanctuary, and the heaviness I felt as I entered was too great to stand. During the praise and worship time, I made my way up to the altar, where I rested my head on the wooden ledge and allowed the choir’s worship and the Lord to wash over me. And as my head rested on the cool surface of the altar, it soften and I saw myself instead with my head against the Savior’s knee. And as I sat, still at His feet with my hands folded in my lap, water poured down on me. I looked, but there was no pitcher or vessel. Instead, it streamed in a continuous, un-ending flow from His hands. It washed over me, restoring my peace, and pooled on the floor below me.

I tried to create a glimpse of what I saw. Alas, my artistic abilities fall so very short, but perhaps your mind can fill in the details of my simple expression:

Friday, July 22, 2011

my morning song

awaken me to You
©7-22-11 hannah mclean

only You
can give me life
awaken me, my Lord

let me
let me come alive

Lord, fill me
with Your presence
awaken me to You
and move me
by Your Spirit
till i am wholly new

Lord, what good are these crippled knees
for dancing ‘round Your throne?
and what good are these heavy hands
for lifting praise to You alone?

Lord, fill me
with Your presence
awaken me to You
and move me
by Your Spirit
till i am wholly new

only You
can give me life
awaken me, my Lord
give me ears to hear Your voice
a heart to know Your word
fill my mouth with praises, Lord
to ever lift to You
and lift my soul to worship, Lord
as i bow down to You

Lord, fill me
with Your presence
awaken me to You
and move me
by Your Spirit
till i am wholly new

awaken me, oh Glorious Creator
i long to see the beauty of Your face
ignite the senses of my spirit
to behold You
awaken me, oh Merciful Majesty
i long to feel the touch of holy hands
ignite the senses of my spirit
to receive You

only You
can give me life
awaken me, my Lord

let me
let me come alive

Lord, fill me
with Your presence
awaken me to You
and move me
by Your Spirit
till i am wholly new

awaken me
awaken me to You, Lord
awaken me
awaken me to You, Lord
awaken me
awaken me to You, Lord
awaken me to You

Sunday, July 3, 2011

Psalm 62 took the words right off my tongue.

The pain of Matthew 13:16
“But blessed are your eyes, for they see, and your ears, for they hear.”
©7-3-11 Hannah McLean

Be my strength

sufficient for each day
A grace to feel
to weep
to kneel
to be burdened by sight
while standing in Light

oh, Mercy,
hold me up
hold me up
till You return

oh, Comfort of my broken heart,
You are enough
You are enough
------

Response to Psalm 62
©7-3-11 Hannah McLean

My lament is nothing new
the world has long since turned away from You
The psalmists wept these tears I weep
and Mary at her Savior’s feet
You never change as You impart
both then and now Your loving heart
Savior, in Your presence I kneel
Thankful for words that speak what I feel
------

Psalm 62
For God alone my soul waits in silence;
from him comes my salvation.
He only is my rock and my salvation,
my fortress;
I shall not be greatly shaken.

How long will all of you attack a man

to batter him,

 like a leaning wall, a tottering fence?

They only plan to thrust him down from his high position.

 They take pleasure in falsehood.

They bless with their mouths,

 but inwardly they curse.

 Selah

For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence,

for my hope is from him.

He only is my rock and my salvation,

my fortress; I shall not be shaken.

On God rests my salvation and my glory;

 my mighty rock, my refuge is God.

Trust in him at all times, O people;

 pour out your heart before him;

 God is a refuge for us.

 Selah

Those of low estate are but a breath;

 those of high estate are a delusion;

in the balances they go up;

 they are together lighter than a breath.

Put no trust in extortion;

 set no vain hopes on robbery;

 if riches increase, set not your heart on them.

Once God has spoken;

 twice have I heard this:

that power belongs to God,

and that to you, O Lord, belongs steadfast love.

For you will render to a man

 according to his work.

Promised justice.

Over the last couple of months, my hatred for Satan has grown, he makes me livid. When I stopped to think about when this feeling really launched forward recently, I realized it was after watching this clip by Francis Chan ( http://vimeo.com/24016195 ) a week after we had the discussion in my LIFE group about the book Love Wins and its denial of hell. In this clip, I was super struck by Revelation 20:10; here it is in context:

Revelation 20:7-10 “When the thousand years are over, Satan will be released from his prison and will go out to deceive the nations in the four corners of the earth—Gog and Magog—and to gather them for battle. In number they are like the sand on the seashore. They marched across the breadth of the earth and surrounded the camp of God’s people, the city he loves. But fire came down from heaven and devoured them. And the devil, who deceived them, was thrown into the lake of burning sulfur, where the beast and the false prophet had been thrown. They will be tormented day and night for ever and ever.

I had never intentionally looked at this passage before. I wish I had before this point, honestly. I feel that is holds immense implications, some of which comfort me. In my bible, this paragraph of text is entitled “The judgment of Satan.” The judgment of Satan...consider that thought for a moment as I tell you what my view of hell seems to have been over time.

I don’t think I ever doubted hell existed. Sin was a concept that was a big part of my life growing up, I understood that sinners without a Savior go to hell. I did not, however, understand sin; the reality of what is was had become so muddled in my mind throughout my childhood, that the word itself felt empty of anything but a habitual aching conscience for unknown reasons. A couple of years after I accepted Christ, I actually had sin explained to me the most clearly by a second grader:
Sunday school teacher: What is sin?
Second grader: Sin is what separates us from God.
Me: Oh.

Until this point, I understood hell was a bad place where I deserved, but didn’t want, to go and heaven was a glorious place where I did want to go, but I didn’t necessarily understand why until I understood what sin was. What makes heaven Heaven, is that we are in perfect union with God. What makes hell Hell, is that we are eternally separated from Him. These truths are enough to make me cling to Jesus Christ with a desire to follow Him and His teachings.

As I read this passage in Revelation, I realized some things in the typical depiction of hell that it directly refutes. All of the caricatures, painting, articulations of hell that I have seen around me present hell as Satan’s domain; a place he brings his captured souls to and then draws pleasure by tormenting them for all of eternity; a place where he stands immense over the burning, cowering humans with a huge pitchfork as his scepter; a place where his work of deceiving as many as possible for his “kingdom” of hell has paid off as he stands victorious over his screaming, despairing subjects. Satan is often painted as an equally powerful force on the opposite end of the spectrum from God, the idea is that you choose God or the devil.

But this passage in Revelation refutes these ideas. What this shows is that hell is not the devil’s domain, it is instead the means by which he will suffer for all eternity for his work; a place where justice will play out as he receives judgment for all of the deceitful, festering sin he brought about through his lies and schemes and intentional deceit; a place where he is rendered helpless, completely defeated and brought to nothing alongside those he has beguiled. It also shows that Satan is not an evil opposite of God; he is subject to Him. Christ has declared victory over him for us and will one day subdue him with the eternal torments of hell.

There is the promise in Genesis 3 that Christ will crush Satan. I believe the devil knows he is defeated. If that is the case, it makes me consider his ways and the drive behind them. Imagine if you knew your end (the stripping of all power and then eternal torment) and Who will send you there...would you not desire to do as much damage to spite them? Is the purpose of his wickedness simply to take as much glory away from God as he possibly can and to grieve the heart of God to the greatest of his abilities? To destroy as many of God’s people as possible? This is a terrible, yet clarifying, thought for those living in sin. The devil tempts us with things we desire, convincing us that it is our good and our pleasure that he wants for us...what a profound lie. It reveals new and profound depths to the deception of the compilation of his work. It is certainly not for our gain...it is not even for HIS gain! His goal and target seems to be to destroy God; His joy, His people, His plans, His purposes, His glory. I venture to you that we are not the point at all, not even a little bit. If we do not have Christ, we are simply pawns in Satan’s plans to take from the only One who deserves.

To my surprise, for the first time, I found comfort in the thought of hell. It may just be me, but I find it comforting that hell is not the devil's domain, it is instead where he will suffer with those he has deceived (It says in revelation 20:10 that these numbers are like the sands of the seashore...such widespread deception!). Justice. I have never considered that Satan will receive judgment, and justice will be brought to fruition for all that he has done. I knew he was defeated and powerless before God, but I never realized that he would be punished by the fires of hell for his deeds.

When I look around me at things like the sex trafficking of children, marriages ripped apart by pornography, mass murders in Mexico in the name of drugs, the list goes on...I can know that the one who started it all and is the destroying, driving and deceiving force behind it will not go unpunished. I am grateful that the one who deceived from the beginning and caused the spiral of every sin of humanity and who purposes to destroy and torment and turn God’s creation away from Him will be brought to justice.

God is just.


And as I consider these things, I find that amid the grief I feel for what I see, my hearts leaps with a new found and deeper desire to, all the more, give all that I could ever have to give, to bring all that I could ever bring, to worship with every ounce of me that can worship the ONE God of ALL. Satan may seek to turn me from my Lord and strive to take what I wish to give to my God, but I pray it would only serve to spur me on to glorify my Savior more and more.

Philippians 2:9–11
Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus EVERY knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and EVERY tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

Friday, July 1, 2011

Picture: The Crown of Praise

During a time of prayer recently with my friend, the Lord put a song on my heart. And as a line of the song played acknowledging Jesus’ crown of praise, He gave me this picture:

Christ hung upon the cross, His head bowed, His arms outstretched. Upon His head sat a twisted crown of thorns, pressed deep into His skull. The picture was dark and lit only by a vibrant, vivid light that poured down from heaven and filled the crown of thorns until it shown with light, streaming from the point of every thorn as if light was shining into a diamond and refracting. And the Lord said, “THIS is the Crown of Praise.”

And after He had shown me this glorious and humbling thing, my friend began to read Psalm 8, and my heart leapt at verse five, “Yet You have made Him a little lower than the Heavenly being and crowned Him with glory and honor.” That is what the Lord had just shown me. When I have considered the crown of my King, I have always imagined beauty, splendor, jewels and fine metals...but this crown was given when He was in a humbled state. The twisted crown formed amid the mockery of men was made glorious on the head of my Lord as He glorified His Father in Heaven.

Wow.
May the light the shines from the piercing thorns penetrate you.
Jesus alone is worthy of our praise.

John 14:6 Jesus said to him, "I am the Way, and the Truth, and the Life. No one comes to the Father except through Me."

Truthful lament
©7-1-11 hannah mclean

Heart of my heart
i burn for You
beneath my furrowed brow
tears stream from my eyes
and land upon my
clenched fists

i melt into You
You immovable Rock
i marvel at the softness of You
and the sweet relief of Your permanence

Hope of my hope
i long for You
my fists release
to folded hands of prayer
i implore You

amid denial of
the only Truth that frees
You never fail
pressing
pressing
pressing
yet Your worthy name withstands

keep me firm to the end
upheld and upholding
whether or not i stand alone

-----
Luke 18:8 Nevertheless, when the Son of Man comes, will He find faith on earth?

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

James 4:10 Humble yourselves before the Lord, and He will exalt you.

I wrote this poem during worship on Sunday, I thought it was a little strange because it didn’t really align with anything I was feeling at the moment in my own life, so I was thinking it must be for the encouragement of someone else...is it you?

Dignified
©6-19-11 Hannah McLean

You restore to me

dignity

Where all has been lost
humbled
and oh, the cost!

Shame defacing

what You’ve made
vandalized
and scrutinized
by my own hands and tongue

Where sin has abounded

Grace is greater still

At the foot of Your cross–

where dirt is covered
by Your blood–
what is shredded
made whole by Your gaping wounds
what is too mangled to look upon
made perfect by Your twisted thorns
what is rusted closed
unlocked by Your open arms

You lift me upright

You have died
that I may live
dignified

Saturday, May 28, 2011

picture: a Light wind

This is the picture that the Lord gave me: I am watching a person approach the Throne, where Light shines so brightly, it is accompanied by a physical wind. A wind that loosens up the dirt that covers the person, leaving it as a cloud of dust behind them. The person is literally stepping out of their covering of dirt, pure and clean as they face and walk into the Light.

purifying Light
© 5-28-11 hannah mclean

our God is a consuming fire
burning away the filth of us
that we may stand before Him
refined by the intensity of His light

must we scrub our skin raw
till it bleeds beneath the stains of our sinful humanity?

no.

for no matter the washing
nor the scraping of our nails upon our dirty flesh
though we be torn open
scoured to our very bones
we will find only the filth of our core
defiled by the heart
and unchangeable by human means

no!

oh Hope
You do not leave us as we are
oh Light
You shine on that which is unfit to be seen
and with our eyes upon You
stumbling toward the promise of true Life
we are made clean

Wind and Fire
consume us as we are
and let us stand anew before You
without blemish, stain or fault
made pure not by our breath
but by Yours

Psalm 36:9 “For with You is the fountain of life; in Your light do we see light.”

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Isaiah 42:11a "Let the desert and its cities lift up their voice..."

Desert of man
©3-24-11 Hannah McLean

Oh desert of man
how long will you stand
surrounded by dust and the burning demands
of this dry and this dark, weary land?

Oh desert of man
you must lift up your voice and cry
“Abide, oh abide, Lord, abide, oh abide, oh abide”

You desert of man...

The raging sands have torn your face
the scalding sun has burned your skin
the thorny weeds have pierced your hands
you’ve turned your back
and closed your eyes
when...
Oh desert of man
you must lift up your voice and cry
“Abide, oh abide, Lord, abide, oh abide, oh abide”

You desert of man...

He has given you a heart of flesh in place of stone
so why does it hollowly drone?
He has given you eternal life instead of death
so where is your purposeful breath?
He has given you all you need to be
so why don’t you live as one who’s been set free?

When the cross stands before you
stained red by His blood

the finished display of His grace

when light beams from the holes
on His hands and His feet
and favor pours from His risen face
why
oh why do you wait?

Oh desert of man
you must lift up your voice and cry
“Abide, oh abide, Lord, abide, oh abide, oh abide”

You desert of man...

Sunday, March 13, 2011

grace for the moment

enough
©3-13-11 hannah mclean

so precise

Your measure

Your wisdom drips
from every drop of grace

You are enough

“flow, mercy, flow,” i cry

but You cover
my moments
as they come

sometimes a flood
and others a trickle

but no matter
the wisdom in or
the understanding of
the measure

You are always enough

Saturday, March 12, 2011

Picture: No more will he move us.

Today during corporate prayer, I was praying in the Spirit with my face lifted toward heaven. As the prayer topic shifted to the Harvest of the Lord, praying for those who did not yet believe, suddenly my neck was pulled upwards so that my head hung down. As it hung limp for a little while, suddenly my body felt completely limp and sagged into the sofa I was sitting on. Here is the picture that went with this:

A puppet on strings being moved by a puppeteer. Suddenly the hand of the puppeteer stopped working and the puppet hung limp. Then, the strings were cut and it fell to the ground in a heap.

The devil was the puppeteer and the title of this image is
“The dance of the puppeteer has ended.”

What a lovely promise.

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

the blades of the plow

Hosea 10:9–13a "Since the days of Gibeah, you have sinned, Israel, and there you have remained. Will not war again overtake the evildoers in Gibeah? When I please, I will punish them; nations will be gathered against them to put them in bonds for their double sin. Ephraim is a trained heifer that loves to thresh; so I will put a yoke on her fair neck. I will drive Ephraim, Judah must plow, and Jacob must break up the ground. Sow righteousness for yourselves, reap the fruit of unfailing love, and break up your unplowed ground; for it is time to seek the LORD, until He comes and showers his righteousness on you. But you have planted wickedness, you have reaped evil, you have eaten the fruit of deception."

plow, sow and reap

©2-23-11 hannah mclean

you have
sinned against Me and
there you remain
midst the harvest of
Satan
reaping evil
and ingesting the fruit
of deception
you grovel
atop unplowed ground
overgrown with
thorns and thistles
that cover what
could be

o stretch out
your fair neck
that I may
set this yoke upon it
and let us plow
together
let us break up this
fallow earth
let us uproot the seeds
of wickedness
that have been sown
hidden
and now multiply

for even as the
blades
pound upon
the thirsty ground
till stony soil
moves beneath My gentle touch
know this
when righteousness
is planted
you will reap love
and lavishly
My presence
My magnitude
and worth
will delight you
as you seek Me

Sunday, February 20, 2011

grateful dust

Jeremiah 30:21b–22
Declares the Lord, “And you shall be My people, and I will be your God.”

“I am yours.”
©2-20-11 hannah mclean

it is not that You have said
“you are Mine.”
it is that You have said
“I am yours.”
oh, i marvel
that such holiness
would bend to kiss
the face of one like me
and from below
around
above and
within
proclaim Your desire to uphold
this passing breath
with that which never grows old
oh, Majestic King
You give Yourself to dust



and save what should be
swept and cast away

Your gaze shines

upon my face
i have heard You say
“I am yours.”

Friday, February 18, 2011

a morning with the Lord

for a moment i linger
@2-18-11 hannah mclean

in the paleness of the morning
You are there
Your presence surrounds me
Your Spirit fills me
as Your face shines
in dawn’s glow

never alone
with You as my companion
i sit amid the deepening hues
and bask in You

neither asking or telling
i simply linger
in what i know to be You

i feel praise and joy
emanating from my every pore
as i absorb Your radiance
honored to be called Your own
humbled by Your time
spent with me

marveling at Your worth
as the sun rises
upheld by Your mercies
for another day

in the paleness of the morning
You are there

Sunday, January 9, 2011

The blessing of weighted feet

The dust that’s gathered
©1-9-11 Hannah McLean

Darkened by the smatter
of the world’s defeat
I stumble on the journey
weighted at the feet
And in my clumsy faltering
I finally lift a cry
Pleading to my Father God
“Do not pass me by”

Oh wash away
the dust that’s gathered all along the way
and cleanse me
in Your blood until I’m free

You stand before me open
and offer “here I am”
You would never pass me by
it’s I who’ve turned and ran
I thank You for the weighted feet
that slow my stumbling pace
But now I ask You, “Wash me, Lord
I long to see Your face”

Oh wash away
the dust that’s gathered all along the way
and cleanse me
in Your blood until I’m free