"But not in Your kingdom, Lord."

Solitude by Ella Wheeler Wilcox

Laugh, and the world laughs with you;
Weep, and you weep alone.
For the sad old earth must borrow its mirth,
But has trouble enough of its own.

Sing, and the hills will answer;
Sigh, it is lost on the air.
The echoes bound to a joyful sound,
But shrink from voicing care.

Rejoice, and men will seek you;
Grieve, and they turn and go.
They want full measure of all your pleasure,
But they do not need your woe.

Be glad, and your friends are many;
Be sad, and you lose them all.
There are none to decline your nectared wine,
But alone you must drink life's gall.

Feast, and your halls are crowded;
Fast, and the world goes by.
Succeed and give, and it helps you live,
But no man can help you die.

There is room in the halls of pleasure
For a long and lordly train,
But one by one we must all file on
Through the narrow aisles of pain.
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I have always enjoyed this poem. When I first encountered it years ago, my heart resonated with its sorrowful lament and meticulously measured rhythm. I am sure you could agree that it is a beautifully written piece. One I hadn’t thought about in a very long time. But the other day, it rolled though my mind following an unexpected phone call.

The call was from a woman at my church who I had spoken to that morning; we had talked about how worn out I was, how I was struggling to regain my ability to function with very little sleep and we had commiserated about the cruelty of winter and its ability to cause long, drawn-out sickness. She had called to ask if she could bring me a meal so I wouldn’t have to worry about cooking for my family. That morning was the only time we had ever spoken (in my memory).

Then entered the poem above and it was accompanied by the articulation of a reality: ”But not in Your kingdom, Lord,” my heart said. The people of God and the Kingdom of God and the person of Jesus...they are different (or at least called to be different). God’s people are called to rejoice with the one who rejoices and to weep with the one who weeps (Romans 12:15); we are called to bear one another’s burdens (Galatians 6:2); we follow Jesus, who ate with the outcasts (Matthew 9:10-13) and knelt in the dirt with the sick (The New Testament). We are called to hop onto the "trains of pain" that others ride as they intersect with our lives.

I was comforted as I marveled at the contrast between the “world” Ella Wheeler Wilcox speaks of and the reality of those who walk in the Light of Jesus. The response I have been given in the expression of my troubles has not been one of avoidance, but instead, people have sought to help me carry my load...be it through offers to take care of my babies, cook me meals, pray, free me up for the time to sleep, etc. No one has squirmed uncomfortably when I have burst into tears at awkward times in the conversations, they haven’t told me to buck up or made me feel weak because of my obvious weaknesses. They have graciously and compassionately endured my whining, hugged me and extended their support in whatever ways they could.

Instead of my sighs being “lost on the air,” they have been answered by the genuine care of loving people. And I am thankful. I am thankful that God’s way is different that the world’s way. I am thankful for the hands that have reached out to help me and the backs that have sought to share in carrying my burden.