i gave it back

surrendered
©4-4-16 hannah mclean

i look at the table in front of me
on it rests an alabaster box
open and
awaiting the offering
with which I will fill it
the one that i will set into Your lap
no longer mine
but Yours

it is not perfume of great price
but it is as fragrant to You
for my offering has wrapped within it
the sweet aroma of prayer
weathered year after weathered year
colored by the memory of countless tears
creased and crumpled by my desperate clutch

20 lines containing 84 words
i place inside my alabaster box
the promise to fulfill my deepest desire
and close the lid

lifting my offering
i raise it up to You
releasing it in Your faithful hands

i place my arms back by my sides
mixed emotions drag themselves across
my unburdened face
as i look down at my empty hands
but i do not turn to go
instead I kneel
and wrap my arms around Your feet
as my tears fall

i will not withhold anything from You
and if ever i find my hands
wound tightly around something
that is not You
may i be faithful to place it into
an alabaster box
that i may be free to cling to You
the One whom my soul loves